Condoms save girlfriend’€™s life

A survey conducted recently by the University of Witwatersrand’€™s Reproductive Health Unit found that the HIV prevalence rate among youth aged between 15 and 24 found is 10.2 percent.

Duration:4min 36 sec

Transcript:

THANDEKA: USanda akanalo nelincinane ixhala lokuba owayethandana naye ngewamsulela ngentsholongwane kagawaulayo kuba babesoloko besebenzisa ukhuseleko xa besiya esondweni. Uthi esi sinqandamathe sakhe sasimkhathalele yaye simcingela siyazi nengxaki eyakuthi ibangwe yintsholongwane kagawulayo. Ngabantu abafana noSanda abayakuthi baphume elubala befundisa abanye abantu ngokuba ii-condoms okanye izingxobo zabathandanayo ziyasetyenziswa.

Translation: Sanda is adamant that there was no way that her boyfriend would have let them  have unprotected sex. She says he was not selfish and they were deeply in love and understand consequences of HIV/AIDS.  It is people like Sanda who could break the silence and educate others about condom usage.  

SANDA: Sadibana naye ngo 1999 September into yethu sayiqala ngo October nge 17 sadibana ebaleni edlala ibhola ndidlala ibhola. Ndathi ngalonyaka siqala ukudibana wabe sele ehamba eyokweluka. Then when he came back wandibuza ukuba when do I think of having sex?. So I told him that mna it’€™s an oath to have sex when I get married so he was very pleased wayi appreciate(a) ukuba uyaqala ukudibana nomntu onjalo onalo ambition. So I took it, he was the right person for mna and bendingenaxhala because ixesha esiphila kulo we live i-peer pressure and mna kwii tshomi zam yayi ndim ndedwa at that time ongeka lali namntu so I was fifteen at that time so ndandiyi appreciate(a) loonto. Sawugqiba unyaka wokuqala nonyaka wesibini singenzi nto there was no sexual intercourse and on the third year saqala ukulala. But he didn’€™t like it because he knew that we were breaking our oath. He felt guilty about it because ibingathi waphule isithembiso sethu sobabini. It was safe sex not a single day singazange si use i-condom.

Translation: We met in 1999, September. We started our affair on October 17. We met at a stadium. We were both playing soccer at the time. Because he had to go to an initiation school, he left me the very same year for that purpose. When he came back he asked me when do I think of having sex. I told him that to have sex it’€™s an oath I make that I will have sex when I get married. He was so pleased and he appreciated the fact that I had such ambition. I thought he was a right person for me and I had no doubts because the times we are living in, there’€™s too much peer pressure. I was the only girl amongst my friends who had never had sex. I was only fifteen at that time. The first and second year passed without us having any sexual intercourse and we started having sex in our third year. He didn’€™t like it because he knew he was breaking our oath. He felt guilty about it. We used to have safe sex not even a single day we hadn’€™t use condom.

THANDEKA: Uve nini ukuba unalentsholongwane?

Translations: How did you discover about his HIV status?

SANDA:UTebo uzi discover(ishe) ukuba unesifo sikagawulayo ngo 2003 i-11th of March that’€™s the day nam nda discover(ishayo). He wasn’€™t sick before. Soyi two sasingekho right after yonke lonto but yena he was much stronger than me.

Translation: The two of us we were depressed but he was better than me because he was stronger than me.

THANDEKA: Uthi nithandene ningabuzani ngezi status zenu? Kwenzeka ntoni ukucacelwa kwenu ukuba uyagula?

Translation: You made love and you never asked each other’€™s HIV status? How did it cross your mind that he was sick?

SANDA: Wavele wa loose(a) iweight then waqala ukungatyi then usister wakhe wathi makakhe ayoku test(a). Phofu watsho ngokwakhe wathi uzakuya ayokuzi test(a) because ii-rumours zazigcwele ukuba he is HIV positive.

Translation: All of a sudden he lost weight and appetite. His sister suggested that he should go for an HIV test.   He volunteered himself that he will go as there were rumours that he was HIV positive.

THANDEKA: So waye nayo intombazana awaye nayo?

Translation: Did he have a girlfriend before you?

SANDA: Ewe but ayina niks ayinayo.

Translation: Yes, but she is negative too.

THANDEKA: So ngo 2003 wava ukuba uphila nalentsholongwane. Waziva njani xa ekuxelela?

Translation: when you found out in 2003 that he is HIV positive how did you feel?

SANDA: Waziyela nhe engadlulanga kum ukuya e-kliniki and then the very last Sunday ndandizakuya iSpurs kuba babefuna ukuba ndiyoku sign(a) nabo ndabona i-weight yakhe ndathi kufuneka khe ayoku test(a) wathi no uzokulanda ii-results on a Tuesday which was on the 11th of March and yayi yi-birthday yam ngalamini then waza kengoku wandixelela. Wathi ucela zendiyoku test(a) but he knows that I’€™m not HIV positive. Then I went they were negative. Ndahlala i- three months ndaphinda ndaya they were still negative. When he told me he was HIV positive the first people came to mind were his parents because he was a very good person. I know body deserves to be HIV positive but especially uTebo. He didn’€™t deserve it. He died last year the 1st of September and he was 25.

Translation: He went to the clinic alone. One Sunday I was going to sign a soccer contract with Spurs I saw that he has lost so much weight and I insisted that he should go for an HIV test he told me that he was going to fetch his results on the following Tuesday which was on the 11th of March and that day was my birthday. He came to tell me about his results. He asked me to go an HIV test as well although he knew that I was HIV negative. I went for my results they were still negative. I waited for three months and went back for another test and they tested negative. When he told me he was HIV positive the first people came to mind were his parents because he was a very good person. I know nobody deserves to be HIV positive but especially uTebo. He didn’€™t deserve it. He died last year the 1st of September and he was 25.

THANDEKA: Niye naqhubekeka nmane nisabelana ngesondo?

Translation: Did you continue to have sex?

SANDA: No, after we discovered his status we didn’€™t sleep again. We were too depressed and he was very worried because I dropped out of school. I couldn’€™t cope.      

Translation: Hayi, azange silale kwakhona emveni safumanisa ukuba unalentsholongwane. Sasi sentlungwini yaye sikhathazekile neyinto eyandenza ukuba ndiphume nasesikoloweni. Kwakunzima.

Translation: Wena kutheni ungafunanga uncedo?

THANDEKA: Akhange nifune ncedo?

Translation:

SANDA: He did go for help?

Translation: Walufuna uncedo.

THANDEKA: Wena, kutheni ungalufunanga uncedo?

Translation: What about you? Why didn’€™t you seek professional help?

SANDA: Because no one was going to help me.

Translation: Kwakungekho mntu uzakundikholelwa.

THANDEKA: Yintoni emenze afune ukuba nisebenzise i-condom?

Translation: What prompted him to insist on condom use?

SANDA: Each time we had sex we both made it a point that we use condoms. Because there are many things out there, there’€™s HIV, pregnancy, teenage pregnancy and we were both living for our parents they were our number priority.

Translation: Ngalo lonke ixesha sisabelana ngesondo sasi qinisekisa ukuba sisebenzisa izingxobo ezikhusela ngokwesondo kuba kukho ugawulayo, ukumitha nokumitha kwabantwana yaye sasiphilelela abazali bethu yayingabona bantu ababalaseleyo kubomi bethu bephala phambili.

THANDEKA: Xa ebesweleka ubuphi?

Translation: Where were you when he passed away?

SANDA: I was at school. He said his good bye but I lived in denial.

Translation:Ndandise sikolweni. Wabhabhayisa kodwa ndabe ndingamkholelwa.

THANDEKA: USanda namawaka waka olutsha baye bachatshazelwe ngugawulayo ebomini babo neyinto eyakuhlala ihleli ezintliziyweni zabo kodwa ke ingaba bangaphi abantu abazaziyo ukuba baphila ngogawulayo. Okanye khe bazidube ngokusebenzisa iizingxobo ezizikhuseli kugawulayo iicondoms.

Translation: To Sanda and thousands of other youths who have been affected by HIV or AIDS in their lifetime it is something that will remain in their hearts for a long time. The question to ask is whether how many of us know about our HIV status or maybe do we use condoms as a form of protection.

E-mail Thandeka Teyise

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