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KHOPOTSO: Dimpho o dilemo tse 29. Ha a se lapeng ho hlokomela bana ba hae babedi o sebetsa jwalo ka moeletsi le motshehetsi ho bao e leng hore ba ena le tshwaetso ya HIV ka tlasa mokgatlo was AIDS Counselling Care and Training Centre e sepetleleng sa Chris Hani Baragwanath, Soweto, Gauteng.  

DIMPHO: First point, when you are going to use a condom you’€™re supposed to teach your partner about a condom before you have sex. The second one, if your partner doesn’€™t use a condom you’€™d rather leave sex because nowadays we have a problem about HIV and AIDS.

KHOPOTSO: Empa le ha a na le tsebo ena ka tsa thibelo ya kokwana hloko ena Dimpho o fumana hore ho boima hore a e sebedise bophelong ba hae.  

DIMPHO: The first time when you teach about safer sex, he feels you judge him. But after some time when you’€™re still continuing about safer sex he accepts, then he’€™s going to use it (a condom).

KHOPOTSO: What do you mean when you say that he feels you are judging him?

DIMPHO: He thinks, maybe, he has HIV or maybe, I have HIV.

KHOPOTSO: Thandi le yena o na le bana ba babedi. O dilemo tsa di 32. Le yena o na le bothata ho buisana le molekane wa hae ka thobalano e bolokehileng kapa hona ho mo fetola mohopolo hore a sebedise kgohlopo.

THANDI: It’€™s difficult to tell my husband to use a condom. He asks me: ‘€˜Why use a condom? You know about your status. Now why (do) you say can we use a condom if you know about your status?’€™

KHOPOTSO: Empa, Thandi ha a ka a hlahisa hore na o a tseba hore o na le tshwaetso ya HIV kapa tjhee, kapa hona ho bolela hore na o tshepa molekane wa hae kapa tjhee. Ba

bangata bomme ba metse ba iphumanang ba tshwaetsehile mme e le hore maphelong ohle a bona ba ile thobalanong le motho a le mong feela – molekane wa bona.

E nngwe feela ntho eo Thandi a re bolelletseng yona ‘€“ yena le molekane wa hae ha ba eso ka ba nka teko ho hlahloba hore na ba bolokehile. Sonto (a dilemo tse 25) ke modumedi a moholo evangeding ya hore balekane ba lokela ho nka teko ena bobeding ba bona.

SONTO: I think it’€™s going to be easy if you both go for a test. The outcome of the result is whereby it’€™s going to be easy even whether they are positive or negative results. But it’€™s going to be easy for you to use a condom because if you are both negative you are going to practice safer sex. If you are positive again you are going to still want to use a condom to protect yourself.

KHOPOTSO: But, I don’€™t understand. Why if the results come out negative would you want to use a condom because you’€™d obviously have a feeling of trust that ‘€˜I am not infected, my partner is not infected. So, why the need for a condom?

SONTO: Ha-ha. I know. But, you know what? Love them all, but trust no one because HIV is here and it’€™s something that you cannot run off it, more especially if you are not staying with your partner. Even if you are staying with him ‘€“ you can’€™t be sure that he doesn’€™t fool around. You are just protecting yourself. It doesn’€™t mean when you are using a condom you won’€™t fall pregnant or you won’€™t get (an) STD. You can if you misuse the condom. But, believe me or not, you do find some difficulties. Even though your boyfriend can agree to use a condom, there will be one day (when) he will say ‘€˜I am tired of this plastic of yours, you know.’€™

KHOPOTSO: Sonto o ena le dilemo tse robedi a bonana le mohlankana wa hae. O lehlohonolo hore mohlankanae o utlwisisa hore hobaneng a lokela ho sebedisa kgohlopo, empa ka nako tse ding ha a dumele tshebedisong ya kgohlopo.

SONTO: He can make sure that today, for instance, when we are busy making love start to be rough. And I will say ‘€˜no, don’€™t do it like that because the condom will blast.’€™ (He’€™ll say)

‘€˜no, it won’€™t,’€™ just to make sure that the condom that day must blast just because he didn’€™t want to use it, you know. And the more the condom blasts he always starts saying ‘€˜you see, these things of yours, you say they are going to protect us’€¦

KHOPOTSO: Ka lebaka la ketso ena ya mohlankana wa hae, Sonto o dumela e be e le sepheo sa hae ho tabola kgohlopo ka nako ya thobalano. Hape o na le bopaki bo tletseng ka mpa.

SONTO: Ja, I can say so, just because you can see now I’€™m pregnant’€¦ He knew that I was not using any prevention, you know’€¦ I can say he cheated on me. He was planning to have a baby without consulting me. And he came with other ways (she laughs).

KHOPOTSO: Pele selemo se pota lefapha la tsa bophelo le ikemiseditse ho fana ka dikgohlopo tse ballwang ho dimilione tse 400 naha ka bophara. Le hona jwale kgohlopo e teng ya bomme e tsejwang ka hore ke ‘€˜Femidom’€™ e etseditsweng ho neha batho ba ba tshehadi Afrika e Borwa boikgethelo ba ho sirelletseha thobalanong ha e fumanehe ha bonolo ka lebaka la theko e phahameng.          

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